Sunday, June 11, 2006
Planetary Influence: Opening in Jupiter, Closing in Mars; Moon Phase – 0.5 days after full moon, Waning
I began this ritual with 1.5 hours of heavy prayer including psalms 33, 90 and many prayers and invocation that take from both Dees writing and my own personal ones within my grimiore. Once the prayers were completed I placed the sigil of Sunday, King Bobogel and Prince Bornogo at my feet. I cast the circle, toned the bell respective to each quarter, and performed the Invoking Pentagram, called to the four quarters and respective Angles, starting from the East, Raphael, Michael, Gabriel and Uriel. I recited my invocation to the four Arch Angels and then proceeded with call one and four. Lastly I cite the invocation to the Eastern quarter Angels CZNS or CZONS, TOTT or TOITT, SIAS or SIGAS, FMND or FMOND, I made this appeal two times.
By the completion of the invocation I was in a deep meditative state. Usually I feel energy and warmth but this time I felt mostly cold as the house was cold I think. I can say I honestly felt the presence of the entities but I also think that for the most part given that this was my first time performing any kind of invocation on my own that my own reservations kept the Angels from revealing too much. There is a part of me that doubts, wondering if I am actually making contact or progress. Throughout the ritual I did feel as if I received guidance, when to do this or that, for example, recite the invocation again, stare into the stone, we have heard your prayer, you have been granted that which you asked for by God, ect. I did hear these instructions pretty clearly but I guess I would have to say that I did “see” what I was hoping for. A more clearer vision as I usually do when Michael is with me. I believe that its my own fear and the Angels respect of that that keeps such from happening. I did get a strong sense, when I appealed to the Angels to grant me their council that I was still not ready. I know that it is going to take my daily or morning workings and rituals, becoming more familiar with the energy and having less fear of the results which will lead me to a clearer vision. All that said I do feel that they were there and that they heard me, I still feel a bit in the dark as to the result of my request. I was specifically asking them to cure my fybromyalgia. I asked specifically that they cure my body of its ailments, pain within my neck and my back and to make me strong again. I think I received the response of three days, I still have a feeling like I need to meditate on what I have done. I continued scrying for what felt like a long time. As I was standing it was getting harder to do so, every now and then I caught myself ‘testing’ to see if the pain was gone, whether it was then or now, at some point I heard or felt that I should not ‘test’ God. I now remember at one point I was instructed to place my hands over my heart and recite the Lords prayer. I began chanting the prayer with my hands over my heart as instructed over and over. As I was doing this I was staring into the stone. There was a great deal of color activity going on within the stone (mostly yellow shifting and forming like a glob) and I felt the presence of it, I have to admit more than once this instance included I was afraid. Getting lost per say in the moment of my task I started to feel a great deal of pain in my chest where my hands were crossed. I was dismayed by this as I thought in my head that this was to be of healing so why would I be feeling so much pain? I tried to get past it and continued to chant. Towards the end the pain went away and I ended with a feeling of content and peace.
As noted it was getting harder to stand and scry, I wasn’t sure at what point I should stop, I wanted to continue until I got some sign, some vision, some contact, and some reassurance that I have made contact or have been heard. Finally, at no sure point of clarity I knew or maybe was instructed that I had been heard and I should close. I also knew that it was not time yet, I had the feeling that I needed more practice, more dedication, more consistency and with all I shall eventually receive the results I am looking for. I guess I would say that nothing shall come to those who offer nothing and that I can’t expect too much my first time around as I am sure Dee did not have this experience either, although I couldn’t compare my effort to his.
In summary I felt this was a good ritual. Over all I for the most part wanted to honor God on this day (Sunday) and re-establish myself spiritually, as I have been severely lacking lately. I think if anything else I was able to accomplish that this morning. I will keep an ear and eye open to what manifest in the coming days as to my request to the Angels. That’s for the most part all I can remember.